Thursday, March 5, 2009

So many....

It's amazing the thoughts that can so quickly run through your mind...I'm discovering a need to be accepted, because I've always felt so out of place everywhere, my entire life...and I would be lying if I said it didn't hurt...but I just feel so...different. I have friends that seem to all have different views of me...some think I'm difficult, a little mean...others think I'm dramatic, and very...over the top, outspoken...and hey...all of those things may be true...but really...I just want to be around people who understand me...who really love me, and desire to be a friend to me, and allow me to do the same...and maybe some of these thoughts are self imposed perceptions...but in one way or another I've gotten those reactions at one time or another...and it's funny...this Jill Scott song sums up my feelings on me right now...

Don't feel no pity for me
Cause I'm going through a couple things,
Life means change,
That's the way it goes,goes
All my life I had a constant burning
A strong deep,desire
An aching ambiguous,yearning,yearning,
yearning

For something better
For something bigger
For something wider
For something higher
And lots of regrets
Cause I ain't seem to found it yet
I've been searching around the world
Never knowing what to expect
I get sad sometimes
Yes I be mad sometimes
Cause I'm out here on the grind
Making mine
And I still can't seem to find
What I've been looking for
Opened so many doors
For real,yo
I just wanna be loved...

I just wanna be loved
Like everybody else does
I just wanna be loved
I just wanna be loved
I just wanna be loved

And I know there are those who do...and I also know that I'll have to continue to push to get past the opinions of people...believe me when I tell you that I get closer every day.

No comments:

Post a Comment