It's been a while...

And I don't like to go this long without expressing myself...but I've been busy...I've discovered I have a love for this...even if no one reads it...I enjoy putting my thoughts down, and hey, someone could get some sort of help from all my talkin, lol...so anyway...a friend (future friend maybe) posed an interesting question..."How can you pursue a dream, if you don't know what your dream is?" And yeah, I know....DUH...you think...but you know how sometimes you get that urge to drive, but you don't have ANY particular destination in mind, you figure you'll figure it out while you're going? That's I guess what I thought my life would be like...I wanted to be free to pursue my goals...but didn't know what they were...or so I thought...I realized that I had KNOCKED my own dreams!!! Can you believe that? Well I can...I still know all the gifts and talents that God has placed in me...but it has been so long with nothing happening that I figured that was pretty much over, give that up...ya dig? But my dreams of having my own publication, radio show, salon amongst other things are not dead...all these years I have fought to attain certain things...trying to make sure I didn't have to ask anybody for anything, make sure I wasn't a burden on anyone else...and at the same time I was killing the spark inside of me...I knew that because I had certain obligations, there were certain things that I was going to have to sacrifice....dang near turned out to be everything. But now I have new hope...I know what I want to do, and I'm taking the steps to do it...God willing, I will be in the position to operate in those things that He's blessed me to be talented with...and everyone in my life will benefit from it...have I been the most faithful servant? Absolutely not...but I love God and I want my life to exemplify allllllll the things He's done for and through me...Ya'll look out for ya girl, I'm about to be grindin!!!