Anger

I do and have struggled with anger, or pride for a while. I think that once I realized I was "shorted" in life, I began to expect of the people I surround myself to be fully invested in me, as I invest in others. Now this is not a bad expectation until it causes conflict or ridiculously strong emotional reactions. I tend to be willing to sacrifice, rearrange, compromise or whatever in any relationship or friendship. I generally have no issue doing this, until I feel I'm not appreciated or properly cared for. I am still trying to find that balance, because I get M.A.D. when I've made a decision with more than me in mind and then someone makes what I deem a selfish decision because they aren't or weren't considering what I might have wanted or needed in the situation. I have a great capacity for anger...it makes me hot, or I get a headache...it takes for it to either pass or for me to reason with myself and point out the fact that it's NOT a big deal...or shouldn't be. I don't see anything wrong with having a struggle, but I do get frustrated when I can't get a handle on myself. I sincerely want to trip someone or kick something lol...BUT...as long as I can recognize it and redirect myself, I figure I'm taking at least a step in the right direction. Another thing I'm working on is guaging when I should check someone. Folks have the craziest things to say to folks they don't know that well. I don't like the whole being familiar with me, bc I am only like that with folks I KNOW. I don't joke, kid or tease, bc that's just not my thing unless we know each other for REAL. I just ask for the same respect I give, and I don't think that's much. When I do give someone what they give they always seem to think I'M being nasty lol...it's funny to me, because I only give the vibe I get...you get smart, I'm going to return a smart remark. Not ALL the time, but when I feel like you done just got TOO comfy with your slick comments, I gotta stop you in your tracks. I don't care what you wear, who you talk to, how you talk to them...don't come for me. But I'm learning...lol, I gotta deal with my anger issue. I swear!