Continuance

I recently decided I would start blogging again. I used to fight internally about sharing my personal feelings, but I've gotten over that. I think that it is important that people be able to relate to someone, and I know there are folks that can relate to the myriad of things I've experienced. I recently relocated with my boyfriend to VA...that period was the toughest in my life. I connected and reconnected with my friends and they were and are very supportive and happy for me. That should have been enough, but per usual, me struggling with allowing others to place their expectations of me in a place of importance, I ended up dealing with various emotions as people questioned me or expressed their "concern". I am insulted by the word concern...concern comes from a place of doubt. It implies that you don't have confidence in the decisions that someone makes. I haven't always made the BEST decisions, but I have taken care of myself for the most part on my own. I've needed to borrow money here and there, but there isn't anyone I know who hasn't...I allowed myself to wallow in a pit of self pity and it got to be too much. I was depressed where I was, yet continuously being told that I didn't need to move anywhere. The city of South Bend holds not much more than all the worst memories ever...everything bad I've ever experienced except for being molested was in South Bend...I don't really relate much to folks who live there, who desire to stay there. I don't fault anyone for it, but I do wish they would do some traveling and bring back some new attitudes to the folks still there. I love the area that I live in now...I struggle some days because I don't have my friends, and I dread making new friends lol...the bonds I have with my friends are from childhood...nothing really gets much stronger than the relationships you have where you've experience love, laughter, pain and anger...when you can get through that...it truly strengthens relationships! I'm really just going on a random tangent, typing thoughts as they come...I'll continue as I continue my new journey... One thing I am anticipating but am a little nervous about it getting into artistry and music out in this area...whole new ball game!